Elk County Forum

General Category => Miscellaneous => Topic started by: Varmit on December 03, 2009, 01:28:18 PM

Title: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Varmit on December 03, 2009, 01:28:18 PM
BEST EVER BLONDE JOKE



A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me.
I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the
table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns
to her and says,

"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble
these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice
cup of tea, and then," he said with a deep sigh. .. . ... ... ...



       "Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."

Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Diane Amberg on December 03, 2009, 02:51:04 PM
HA, now that's funny!
Title: Paper or Plastic
Post by: Jo McDonald on December 04, 2009, 08:30:45 AM
 




The world is just getting too complex for me. They even mess me up every time I go to the grocery store. You would think they could settle on something themselves but this sudden "Paper or Plastic?" every time I check out just knocks me for a loop.

I bought some of those cloth reusable bags to avoid looking confused but I never remember to take them in with me.

Now I toss it back to them. When they ask me, "Paper or Plastic?" I just say, "Doesn't matter to me. I am bi-sacksual." Then it's their turn to stare at me with a blank look.









Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Judy Harder on December 04, 2009, 09:01:51 AM
Good one Varmit, I did laugh out loud.....and Jo, I groaned big time.
Thanks for the giggles.
Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Wilma on December 04, 2009, 03:31:39 PM
When they ask me "Paper or plastic?", I just say "Yes".
Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Teresa on December 08, 2009, 05:43:04 PM
Varmit~~~ you hearing the ice crack under your size 13's??
Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Varmit on December 08, 2009, 10:16:12 PM
Actually Teresa, that reminds me of another....

There once was a blonde who had always heard about ice fishing, so one day she tried it. She went to an icy area, cut a hole, and started fishing. All of a sudden, she hears a voice. "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!" She ignores it and moves to another area, cutting a hole, and beginning to fish again. Again she hears the booming voice. "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!!" She is starting to get freaked out now. "Lord? Is that you?" she asks. In reply she hears, "NO, THIS IS THE RINK MANAGER!"
:D :D :D
Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Diane Amberg on December 09, 2009, 09:24:45 AM
Ha! Very cute.
Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Teresa on December 09, 2009, 04:38:12 PM
Not funny~~ I had no idea That I was in the skating rink... Anyone could have made that mistake..  :P
Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Varmit on December 09, 2009, 07:59:07 PM
HA!

Question:  2 blondes walk into a bar...what should they've done??

Answer:  Duck.
Title: Re: Best Blonde Joke Ever.
Post by: Judy Harder on January 06, 2010, 09:03:02 AM

Out of all the blonde jokes, this one has to be one of the best!

Football FINALLY makes sense..........
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game They had
great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked
her how she liked the experience.
'Oh, I really liked it,' she replied, 'especially the tight pants and
all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were
killing each other over 25 cents.'
Dumbfounded, her date asked, 'What do you mean?'
'Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of
the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarterback! Get the
quarterback!' I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents."


::)