Non-Drinking, Non-Smoking, Non-Card Playing Saloon

[Ozark Iron John]

clodda dump - clodda dump - clodda dump

Ozark Iron John pushes his horse to climb the mountain.  It's dark and he can't see the trail, but Bucephelus knows the way home.  He hopes the Injuns haven't got his Momma.  He rides into the night, plotting how he's going to take revenge on Camille Eonich and the others that locked him up.

They think that little Saloon of their's made a bonfire Buck.  I'm gonna show 'em a bonfire the size of Lawrence.  I'm gonna show 'em a bonfire the size a Texas.  They'll see.

clodda dump - clodda dump - clodda dump

[Ozark Iron John]

OIJ stalls Buck well after mid-night.  He gives him an extra ration of oats and a big chunk of clover hay and works the cestern pump to fill the troth with fresh water.

You did well today, boy.

He slips silently into the cabin without disturbing anyone and finds a big plate of roast turkey and bisquits setting on the stove.  OIJ eats heartily and is glad to be home.

The last thing he does before turning in for the night is .... charge his pistols.

[Ozark Iron John]

John wakes up early the next morning to find his mother already up and the coffee ready.



Them people throwed me in jail yesterday, Momma.  That cookie fella and his gal friend Cammie done it.  They locked me up and wouldn't let me see the Major a'tall.  They didn't seem to give two hoots about me seein' Injun sign either.  I reckon they know'd all about it.  I'm gonna go back to the old crossin' and follow them tracks today.  Maybe they's weren't Injuns afterall.  Maybe they's JayHawkers from Kansas on un-shod ponies.

N.R. better ride with me.

OIJ's mother hussels his 11 year old nephew up and fixes them both breakfast.

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[Lucky Irish Tom]

Shhhh...we iz trackin' Injuns!

I thought we wuz huntin Wabbits! 

[Ozark Iron John]

OIJ saddles Bucephelus and Big Red.  He and N.R. mount up and head off into the forrest in search of Injun / JayHawker sign.

What're we huntin' today, Uncle John?

I seen some sign down by the clover field yesterday mornin'.  We're gonna go check it out.  Keep your eye peeled.  They's Injuns and JayHawkers about.

Them the same JayHawkers that killed old Pap, Uncle John?

Naw, these'd be new comer JayHawkers.  They ain't nearly as tough as them that killed Pap.

[Ozark Iron John]

River Crossing
by Christopher Marona

That's the old crossin' N.R.  Old timers used it.  We use the one further down stream now.

Look at them tracks.  See 'em.  Count 'em.  1, 2, 3, that'n over there makes 4, 5 maybe 6 horses.  What can you tell me about 'em?

They're hard and dried up.  Probably made yesterday or the day before and they ain't got shoes, Uncle John.  They's un-shod ponies comin' from up that'a way and goin' down yonder.

Right!  and who rides un-shod ponies in these parts?

Injuns, Uncle John.

Right!  and New Comer JayHawkers tryin' to sneak around and pass for Injuns.  Let's follow 'em and see where they went.

[Ozark Iron John]

OIJ and his nephew sneak along the trail following the tracks of the un-shod ponies.

See how that'n there digs in deep, N.R.  That's carryin' a big man or a load.  Look back.  See how Buck makes a great big deep track and Big Red's is not?  Why is that, do ya suppose.?

Cause you're on Buck and I'm on Big Red, Uncle John.

Right.  We're gonna pickup the pace.  Keep up!

OIJ kicks Buck up into a trot as they swing away from the creek and down across the valley.

[Ozark Iron John]

The going is good.  The ground is soft and the horses are sure footed.  OIJ and N.R. are able to lope across the valley and up onto a saddle between two hills.  OIJ reins up and dismounts.

Get down, N.R.  Let's let 'em rest a bit.  Look around.  See if you can see where them boys got down.

OIJ pickets the horses and he and his nephew streatch their legs.  He looks back over the valley and surveys the ground they just crossed.

Lookie here, Uncle John!  One of 'em crapped right here by this tree.

N.R. points to the ground and laughs.

They're white men alright.

Why'd ya say that, N.R.?

Cause Injuns don't eat that good and they don't use paper, Uncle John.

Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Haaaw!  You're learnin' boy, you're learnin'.

[Ozark Iron John]

OIJ walks  over to Bucephelus and opens up his saddle bag.  He takes out an Uberti 1862 Police .36 cal. revolver and charges it.



Knowin' they's white men makes a difference N.R.  Injuns might've just been slippin' through here huntin' or something.  Whites is up to no good.  They're Carpet Bagger JayHawkers lookin' for something to steal.  Put this pistol in your belt and don't drop it.

[Ozark Iron John]

I reckon I ought to tell you about what happened to me yesterday.

What happened, Uncle John?

Them people in town, locked me up.

Why?  What'd you do?

I didn't do nothin' N.R.  I rode into town, lookin' for the Major to tell him about them tracks.  Then that Cammie woman, who thinks herself a Sheriff worked her witchcraft on me and locked me up.  Then she hit me in the head with a bottle.

OIJ points to a knot on the side of his head.

Why'd she do that, Uncle John?

They don't like us in there N.R.  We're Southern.  They're Carpet Baggers and New Comers and Republicans and they're out to put us down every chance they get.

That Cookie fella's weird too.  You stay the heck away from him and don't take no candy from him either.  Ya Hear?   I mean it.

I ain't gonna be able to go in there for awhile.  I broke outta their jail house and I reckon I'm gonna be on a Wanted Poster or somthin'.

[Ozark Iron John]

Mount Up!  We're gonna follow this trail down through the forrest untill it crosses the road to CAS City.  My bet is them boys will pickup the road and go east or west.  I doubt they'll continue on south.  Let's go!

[Ozark Iron John]

OI John and his nephew follow the trail of the un-shod ponies all afternoon.  As the sun starts to set in the west they approach the road to CAS City.  Buck's ears perk up and he becomes anxious.  John looks around and notices the forrest has become silent.  He motions for N.R. to close the gap.

Something ain't right, boy.  Stay close.

As they move around a big cedar tree they ride right up on an old trapper's cabin.  It has a well tended vegitable garden off to the east and a dilapadated leanto shelter for animals.  Personal belongings are scattered around the yard.

Hello in the House!

No response.  John dismounts and hands his reins to his nephew.

Keep your eye peeled.  I'm gonna check inside.

The door to the cabin is wide open.  John notices a black dog curled up under the porch, but the dog is dead.  He draws his pistol and slowly walks inside.

[Ozark Iron John]

It's a slaughter house N.R.  A man and a woman and two kids, all dead.

He walks to his horse and slides Sugar out of the rifle scabbard and chambers a round.

Tie these horses over by the leanto.  Unsaddle 'em and feed 'em oats and hay.  Look around and find water.  We're gonna bed down here for the night.

Don't come inside the house.

John returns to the house to tend to the bodies.

[Ozark Iron John]

N.R. tends to the horses and then gathers wood for a fire.  He goes over to the garden and picks a cabbage and three ripe tomatos.  John drags four bodies and the dog around back of the cabin and scratches out five shallow graves.  The moon is high in the night's sky before they're able to rest.

What happened here, Uncle John?

I don't know, Nephew.  It weren't good, that's for sure.

Them kids were littler than me.

I know boy.  I buried 'em.  I reckon we'll hit the road to CAS City tomorrow.  We'll go to town and see the Marshall.

What about that Sheriff lady and her Wanted Poster?

I'll just have to risk it.  These boys we're trackin, they're bad and I don't want to run into 'em alone.

You ain't alone Uncle John.

No, I ain't by God.  You did well today, N.R.  You did well.

[Ozark Iron John]

John wakes up with the dawn.  He gets up and tends to the horses.  He gives them oats and hay from the dead family's barn.  He stokes the coals and puts a little wood on the fire.  He makes fried cabbage and ham slices for breakfast.

Wake up N.R.  Come on boy, we're burnin' daylight.

After they eat, John takes a pumpkin out of the garden and sets it up on a post.

We're gonna clear and charge these pistols nephew.  Stand up there and shoot that pumpkin like I taught ya.

N.R. takes the small frame .36 cal. revolver out of his belt and very deliberatly cocks it and shoot it.  Blam!  Blam!  Blam!Blam!Blam!   Chunks of the pumpkin fly.

Good Job, N.R.  Good Job.

John does the same with both of his pistols and then he charges all three with fresh loads.

Let's saddle the horses and head out.  We got work to do.

[Ozark Iron John]

They ride along the trail heading away from the cabin.  Its hard to distinguish specific tracks in the hard ground.  The sun is coming up in the east and it looks like another fine day in the Ozarks.

Which way do you think they went, Uncle John?

I reckon they went down this trail.  It leads to the road and its generally in the direction they've been goin'.  We'll ride down it untill we get to the road and then we'll head west.

Do ya think we're gonna catch up too 'em?

I don't know.  I'd say they're about a day and a half a head of us, but they're leadin' a pair of horses loaded down with loot.  That might slow 'em up a bit.  If we do come up on 'em, you be careful.  They'll be watchin' me.  If things go bad, you pull that pistol and shoot a horse, then skedaddle.  I'll cover ya and follow.  Don't hesitate, now.  Do like I taught ya.

OIJ kicks Bucephelus up into a trot.  N.R. and Big Red keep pace.

[Ozark Iron John]

When they get to the big east / west road OIJ stops and dismounts.  He hands the reins to N.R. and looks for sign.

Lookie here, Neil.  They went this way.  See this big track?  That's that same horse with the heavy load.  We're gonna follow 'em, Hun.  If we catch up, you do like I told you.

OIJ cocks his finger and snaps his thumb like a pistol shooting down towards the ground.

[Ozark Iron John]

They ride along at a pretty good pace for more'n two hours.  Neither saying very much.  Then all of a sudden they come upon a clearing and parked in the middle of the road is a team of Missouri Red mules and a big farm wagon full of grain.  OIJ reins up and spins Buck around looking for the driver.  He hears a noise off to the side of the road and he plunges Buck into the forest.  N.R. and Big Red follow.

They come upon a scene that is hard to describe.  A big man settin' on a Paint horse holdin' a shotgun appears to be watching two other men beat up a fourth.  The fourth man is old and obviously not able to defend himself any longer.  OIJ and his nephew have arrived in the nic of time.

"What's goin' on here?"  He shouts as N.R. slips Big Red to the left of Buck and forward.

The big man on the Paint turns and snarls, "None a your bidnez!"

I'm makin' it my business.  You boys, turn that man loose.

The big man starts to level his shotgun at OIJ.  BLAM!  N.R. shoots his horse.  The horse rears and throws the big man to the ground.  Caarumph!  OIJ pulls his pistol and covers the other two. 

I said, turn that man loose!

Do you think I ought to skedaddle, Uncle John?

Naw, you stay right thare.

[Ozark Iron John]

The old man falls to the ground, but gets up.  He turns and kicks one of the younger men in the groin.  He collapses into a heap and groans in agony.  The big man rolls over on his side and crys out.

Aaahhooooww!

Shut up you two.  What's goin' on here?

The old man turns and say's, "You saved my life fella!  They was gonna kill me, for sure."  "And this'n here", the old man kicks the man on the ground again, "he ain't right."

[Ozark Iron John]

OIJ points his gun at the man that is still standing.

Are you the one's at that cabin?

OIJ cocks his pistol.

Don't lie to me boy, I'm gonna find out.

The man looks down to the ground and nods his head.

N.R. get down and get that shotgun.  Old timer, you dis-arm them two.  Don't screw with me boys.  I'll shoot you just as soon as look at you.  I buried them kids.