"Anachronisem" Feedback - commentary encouraged!

[Scattered Thumbs]

Excellent story and very well written. Definetely worth publishing.
Hope you manage to get it published.


PS Please don't leave us in mid air 

[Stoney Pete]

You did not forget the girl.

If you mangage to get her out of the country and into the rednecks arms again, the romantic in me will be eternally greatful.

[El Peludo]

 

Stony Pete, this is beginin' to sound like the fan mail for a soap opera.  I'm right there with you on this, by-the-way.   

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[Drydock]

Lord amighty, who da thunk there'd be so many consarned romantics under them cowboy hats!   

[Brazos Bucky Smith]

  Whewy!  Glad there is more, I thought you were going to end it with Tip on the ground and the General shooting the Imam.  Kinda like letting us figure the ending.  But no, thanks for continuing on.  I and these here cowboys figure you got a future as a writer!

Brazos

[Stoney Pete]

You brought her back fast with out waisting my reading time with military red tape.  Yet you did not spoon feed me by having him waiting for her train.  A nice balance that I really enjoyed. 

I await your next installment.

[Drydock]

Sorry Pete, thats it!    Maybe someday I'll write a companion piece, but right now I'm starting research on my next work. 

[El Peludo]

 

Excellent way to end it!  I really do like happy endings.  Well done.

How about the real life Chief?  When is he going to come home?  I hope he does not do it in so dramatic or traumatic fashion.  Take good care.

[Old Top]

Drydock,

Ok I am missing something here what is the shovel for, enjoyed the story quite a bit hope to see it in print.  Yes I know you hate to explain when things should be clear to the reader.

Old Top

[Brazos Bucky Smith]

  Wells, I think her involvment started out with her following Tip after the bad guys (terrorists) who killed the villagers that helped him.  She carried a shovel to bury him after he'd be kilt 'cause there were to many of the bad guys!   Well there weren't and he got away.   She just wants to have the last laugh on him, when she shows up and makes him swallow his chew, heh heh heh!

Brazos 

[Drydock]

Thats right folks, the first time she went into the mountains after him, she took a shovel "Then I will bury him".  Recovering in Shiraz, she mentioned it as well, ("I brought a shovel.") making him gag.  He later joked with her about it. ("Maybe you'll finaly get to bury me.")  There's a bit of Shakespeare in it as well:  "I come not to praise Ceasar, but to bury him."

Due back September 05, due to retire then after 20 years Naval Service.  Heading up to Kuwait in a couple of days for 2 weeks, to train reservists in boat operations.  Christmas in a desert tent this year.

I've been approached by the Army about a possible conversion, perhaps a warrent Commission.  Be another 3 years most likely, with a tour in Iraq.  Thinkin' about it. . .

[Stoney Pete]

 I understood the significance of the shovel, just did not realize you wasn't bringing us along on her search for him.  I've heard it said, "Leave 'em wanting more."    I want more.  Great ending though.  It's one that allows the reader to use his/her own imagination.

I wish you all the best in your retirement or conversion decisions.  I hope to see more stories from you in the future.

[Brazos Bucky Smith]

Howdy Drydock,

I'll second that!  Enjoy whatever you decide to do! wether it is three more years of Military life (or more), civilian life in retirement, or writting.  but for us, keep writting, I too, will be looking for your future books.  Merry Christmas  to all of you serving in that theater!  God bless you all.

Brazos