For Better or For Worse
A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much
in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the
refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different
countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of
saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... you know... they have frozen
glasses... "
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by
saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of
the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they
have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be
right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5
dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom
caps, and pork strips.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and
all that..."
"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?... LISTEN UP, @*#%HEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE HE77 UP, DRINK YOUR DA*^ BEER IN YOUR DA%# FROZEN MUG, AND EAT YOUR @&%^*+G HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED A$$ ISN'T GOING TO A *&@#%^G BAR! THAT S*%T IS OVER...GOT IT, A$$*&#E?"
...and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?