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Elk County Forum
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Miscellaneous
| Topic:
WHY??
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Topic: WHY?? (Read 360 times)
Jo McDonald
Hero Member
Online
Posts: 2202
Life Is Good.
WHY??
«
on:
January 17, 2009, 05:57:15 pm »
QUESTIONS THAT HAUNT ME!
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If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
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Can you cry under water?
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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
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What disease did cured ham actually have?
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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
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Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
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Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
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If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
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If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
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Do you ever wonder why Teresa and Kjell let me become a member of this forum?
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Logged
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU GATHER, BUT WHAT YOU SCATTER....
THAT TELLS WHAT KIND OF LIFE YOU HAVE LIVED!
Catwoman
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 2174
Re: WHY??
«
Reply #1 on:
January 17, 2009, 06:32:04 pm »
I know the answer to the last one...BECAUSE THEY HAD TO...If Momma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy! lol
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W. Gray
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 2097
Re: WHY??
«
Reply #2 on:
January 17, 2009, 09:40:56 pm »
For the skinny on why Jimmy cracks corn see
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1288/who-is-jimmy-and-why-does-he-crack-corn
Logged
"If one of the many corrupt...county-seat contests must be taken by way of illustration, the choice of Howard County, Kansas, is ideal." Dr. Everett Dick, The Sod-House Frontier, 1854-1890.
"One of the most expensive county-seat wars in terms of time and money lost...” Dr. Homer E Socolofsky, KSU
Rudy Taylor
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 1112
Re: WHY??
«
Reply #3 on:
January 18, 2009, 09:10:27 am »
Jo, you made me smile this morning.
What a way to start the day ... and week.
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It truly is "a wonderful life."
sunflower
Sr. Member
Offline
Posts: 73
Re: WHY??
«
Reply #4 on:
January 18, 2009, 07:04:54 pm »
I think Rudy provided the answer to the last question!!
I know this isn't the proper place to ask...but Jo, how is Fred doing?
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Jo McDonald
Hero Member
Online
Posts: 2202
Life Is Good.
Re: WHY??
«
Reply #5 on:
January 18, 2009, 07:33:25 pm »
Thank you for asking -- he is really doing well -- he has an appointment with the urologist next Wednesday for the prostate procedure and then I think we are GOOD TO GO !!
We have given the ole boy a top to bottom renovation and the Dr's are pleased and that is good enough for us.
( Whispering) since Teresa and Kjell are out of town, we can do this on this thread. tee hee
Logged
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU GATHER, BUT WHAT YOU SCATTER....
THAT TELLS WHAT KIND OF LIFE YOU HAVE LIVED!
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