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Cas City Forum Hall & CAS-L  |  GENERAL TOPICS  |  Tall Tales (Moderator: Silver Creek Slim)  |  Topic: Butchered Sayings 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
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Author Topic: Butchered Sayings  (Read 18809 times)
Forty Rod
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« on: July 07, 2005, 05:41:00 pm »

I's beadier than a fasting pullet.

This is the shortest point between two distances.
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Joyce (AnnieLee)
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« Reply #1 on: July 07, 2005, 08:59:19 pm »
But wheeze all leave no tern unstoned.
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Forty Rod
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« Reply #2 on: July 07, 2005, 11:58:47 pm »
Give whirled peas a chance.
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Forty Rod
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« Reply #3 on: July 08, 2005, 12:00:01 am »
This just warms the heartles of my...well, you know.
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Joyce (AnnieLee)
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« Reply #4 on: July 08, 2005, 04:53:31 am »
I understood that.  Embarrassed

Cheesy

AnnieLee
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Unrepentant WartHog
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Silver Creek Slim
Buckaroo
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« Reply #5 on: July 08, 2005, 10:46:52 am »
Bring in the next cow.  Grin

Slim
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Delmonico
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« Reply #6 on: July 08, 2005, 12:11:26 pm »
...
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Mongrel Historian


Always get the water for the coffee upstream from the herd.

Ab Ovo Usque ad Mala

The time has passed so quick, the years all run together now.
Silver Creek Slim
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« Reply #7 on: July 08, 2005, 12:57:50 pm »
Quote from: Delmonico on July 08, 2005, 12:11:26 pm
...
U'z lernt Morse code, too?  Grin

Slim
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I love the smell of Black Powder in the morning!
Delmonico
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« Reply #8 on: July 08, 2005, 06:10:54 pm »
Just S. Grin
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Mongrel Historian


Always get the water for the coffee upstream from the herd.

Ab Ovo Usque ad Mala

The time has passed so quick, the years all run together now.
Joyce (AnnieLee)
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« Reply #9 on: July 08, 2005, 07:10:52 pm »
Eyes before eaves, except in a dictionary.

Cheesy

AnnieLee
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Unrepentant WartHog
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Delmonico
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« Reply #10 on: July 08, 2005, 07:37:29 pm »
He who hesitates gets run over by the bus.

<Author's note, A short bus full of Bozos.>
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Mongrel Historian


Always get the water for the coffee upstream from the herd.

Ab Ovo Usque ad Mala

The time has passed so quick, the years all run together now.
Forty Rod
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« Reply #11 on: July 08, 2005, 08:09:45 pm »
Historical note:

Edward Ezra Tate, a Union captain during the recent unpleasantness, realised late in 1864 that the war was nearing its end. 
Captain Tate was also astute enough to forsee the great westward expansion that was certain to come. 

The southerners would go west seeking new freedoms rather than return to a shattered and desolate south and harrsh Yankee reconstruction.

Yankees would go west looking for work and opportunity rather than return to closed factories and mills and a broken economy in the north.

Captain Tate realised one day thay all of the maps he had ever seen had north at the top.  Likewise all compasses pointed north.  What foolishness, thought he.  If everyone were to go west wouldn't it make more sense if west were at the top of the maps and compasses pointed west?

He contacted some appropriate people and by war's end had procured several thousand Tate's Improved Compasses and corresponding Tate's New Horizon Maps.

It was here that the Law Of Unintended Consequences kicked in.  It seems that the compasses and maps inevitably got seperated one from the other. Nneither was particularly well marked, and instructions were rudimentary at best.  Many who had Tate's wonderful compass and a conventional map, found them selves inexplicably in Mexico, while those with a standard compass and a Tate map were bound for Canada.

Confusion grew and multiplied until the Army Corps of Engineers came to the rescue with both maps and compasses in the old "north at the top" fromat.

This brief fiasco is what has led us to the well know phrase "He who has a Tate's is lost."

Have a good weekend and read Chapter eleven for Monday.
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El Peludo
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« Reply #12 on: July 08, 2005, 09:18:45 pm »
Life is just a chair of bowlies!

I'm thinker than some drunkle peep I am.

I know a feller who "has a Tate"s all the time; has all his life, for a matter of fact.
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El Peludo (The Hairy Man)
Las Vegas, Nevada Territory
Lifer in: Life, NRA, NAHC, SASS, SBSS,WARTHOG, DIRTY RATS
IBEW(Retired), Shooter since 1955.
             Roop County Cowboy (FF)
             Original Member: Grass Valley Rangers,
             Camp Beale Land and Cattle Company.
Forty Rod
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« Reply #13 on: July 08, 2005, 11:45:24 pm »
A chair of bowlies?  I haven't heard that in thirty years.

Thanks. 

That just warms the heartles etc.

 Grin Grin Grin Grin Roll Eyes
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Four-Eyed Buck
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Tusco LongRiders,
« Reply #14 on: July 09, 2005, 12:15:57 am »
Del, An old van full of Mexican's?........Buck Cool Roll Eyes Grin
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I might be slow, but I'm mostly accurate.....
Delmonico
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« Reply #15 on: July 09, 2005, 10:05:05 am »
I don't cross I-80 on foot. Grin
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Mongrel Historian


Always get the water for the coffee upstream from the herd.

Ab Ovo Usque ad Mala

The time has passed so quick, the years all run together now.
Calamity Jane
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WWW
« Reply #16 on: July 09, 2005, 10:42:09 am »
CJ's personal favorite: He's a few bricks short of a half dozen
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Forty Rod
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« Reply #17 on: July 09, 2005, 11:10:24 am »
Sounds like the kind of person who would shoot a Mouse-handled broomer.
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Delmonico
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« Reply #18 on: July 09, 2005, 11:14:17 am »
You buttered your bread, now lie in it.
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Mongrel Historian


Always get the water for the coffee upstream from the herd.

Ab Ovo Usque ad Mala

The time has passed so quick, the years all run together now.
Silver Creek Slim
Buckaroo
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« Reply #19 on: July 11, 2005, 10:30:23 am »
Quote from: Delmonico on July 09, 2005, 11:14:17 am
You buttered your bread, now lie in it.
Grin

Slim
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I love the smell of Black Powder in the morning!
Forty Rod
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« Reply #20 on: July 11, 2005, 12:32:42 pm »
............................... Fart!!!  .............................
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Joyce (AnnieLee)
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« Reply #21 on: July 11, 2005, 12:37:39 pm »
As I told a co-worker today:

Yep, it's a phase. They go through it when they are 3, when they are 8, when they are 15, and some boys NEVER outgrow it!!

:: Smacks Forty some more::

Cheesy

AnnieLee
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Unrepentant WartHog
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Pepper Mill Creek Gang
RATS
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Wielder of "Elle KaBong", the WartHog cast iron skillet
Nasty Lady
Delmonico
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« Reply #22 on: July 11, 2005, 07:37:34 pm »
What ya need to do is go to the hospital and get one a dem operations.  When they are done, not only do they not mind if ya pass gas, they encourage it, they even to get excited about it and praise you. Grin Grin
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Mongrel Historian


Always get the water for the coffee upstream from the herd.

Ab Ovo Usque ad Mala

The time has passed so quick, the years all run together now.
Russ T Chambers
Littlest ol' fart Cowboy in Nevada Territory
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Well preserved for my age!
« Reply #23 on: July 11, 2005, 09:39:41 pm »
Has he found out about sticking his hand in his armpit and working the armpit arm as a fart bellows, yet?  Huh Huh Roll Eyes Roll Eyes Roll Eyes
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Russ T. Chambers
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Joyce (AnnieLee)
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« Reply #24 on: July 11, 2005, 09:46:06 pm »
Alas, yes he has.

AnnieLee
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Unrepentant WartHog
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Pepper Mill Creek Gang
RATS
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Wielder of "Elle KaBong", the WartHog cast iron skillet
Nasty Lady
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Cas City Forum Hall & CAS-L  |  GENERAL TOPICS  |  Tall Tales (Moderator: Silver Creek Slim)  |  Topic: Butchered Sayings « previous next »
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