Heh, heh......... At least I got me a jab in. Since I'm waitin' fer a pot ah lead ta melt, lemme tell ya.
Run inta a couple from Binghampton, NY l'il while ago 'n they was lost.
"The exit from the interstate says 'Princess Anne Rd.', we came out on Independence and now it says Holland. We want to get to General Booth Blvd."
"OK, lemme help ya."
"To Princess Anne?"
"Eventually, yeah."
"We were here three years ago. I doesn't look the same."
"Three years ago we would be standing in the middle of a field. That office building accross the street was a stand of woods. Forget all of that.
" That is Holland Rd. You were on Independence when you got off the interstate and you went straight. Independence only stays Independence if you turned right at the stop light. Since you stayed straight, you're on Holland now.
"Turn outtah this parking lot, right, onto Holland. Follow it until it dead ends, or 'T's' with Princess Anne. That will be the Princess Anne Road you're looking for. Turn left there.
"Go straight. You'll come to a stoplight. A 7-11 will be on the right and a dental/medical building on the left. Go straight thru the light and you'll be on General Booth. Don't turn right because if you do, you'll be on Princess Anne Rd. again instead of where ya wanna be."
"About how many lights down?"
"Five or six hundred. One at every intersection. They have cameras on some that mail you a traffic summons if you cut a light by a tenth of a second. And, old folks driving Buicks along with air heads with cell phones driving mini-vans that might get to 25 mph before then next light stops them."
"You've been here awhile, huh? Know you're way around."
"Oh yeah. That office building across the street I said was a stand of trees the last time you were here? That's my back yard.
"When ya get to the 7-11 where Princess Anne turns into General Booth. That was a regular stop of mine for coffee. No more.
"Ya see, a couple years ago, they destroyed the woods for that ugly thing. A couple weeks ago, they destroyed my club, whistling distance from General Booth Blvd. 7-11. I have no reason to be there anymore.
"Y'all follow the direction I gave ya, yer gonna be fine. Enjoy yer visit. 'n welcome to 'Duh Beach'
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