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Cas City Forum Hall & CAS-L  |  GENERAL TOPICS  |  Tall Tales (Moderator: Silver Creek Slim)  |  Topic: "Anachronisem" Feedback - commentary encouraged! 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
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Author Topic: "Anachronisem" Feedback - commentary encouraged!  (Read 8623 times)
Stoney Pete
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« Reply #25 on: December 12, 2004, 06:59:08 am »

You brought her back fast with out waisting my reading time with military red tape.  Yet you did not spoon feed me by having him waiting for her train.  A nice balance that I really enjoyed. 

I await your next installment.
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If it can't be nice, eaten, make money, create comfort or provide real pleasure.........kill it or trade it in on new one!
Drydock
GAF #19, BC, CC, SoM Luetenant Colonel, Ordnance MA1 USN (Ret.) SASS 1248 Life
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« Reply #26 on: December 12, 2004, 10:54:29 am »

Sorry Pete, thats it!  Shocked  Maybe someday I'll write a companion piece, but right now I'm starting research on my next work. 
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Civilize them with a Krag . . .
El Peludo
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« Reply #27 on: December 12, 2004, 02:00:42 pm »

 Wink Grin

Excellent way to end it!  I really do like happy endings.  Well done.

How about the real life Chief?  When is he going to come home?  I hope he does not do it in so dramatic or traumatic fashion.  Take good care.
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El Peludo (The Hairy Man)
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Old Top
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« Reply #28 on: December 12, 2004, 05:26:01 pm »

Drydock,

Ok I am missing something here what is the shovel for, enjoyed the story quite a bit hope to see it in print.  Yes I know you hate to explain when things should be clear to the reader.

Old Top
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Brazos Bucky Smith
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« Reply #29 on: December 13, 2004, 01:18:12 am »

 Wink Wells, I think her involvment started out with her following Tip after the bad guys (terrorists) who killed the villagers that helped him.  She carried a shovel to bury him after he'd be kilt 'cause there were to many of the bad guys! Shocked  Well there weren't and he got away. Cool  She just wants to have the last laugh on him, when she shows up and makes him swallow his chew, heh heh heh! Grin

Brazos  Cheesy
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Brazos Bucky
"A man oughta do what he thinks is right."
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Drydock
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« Reply #30 on: December 13, 2004, 07:59:09 am »

Thats right folks, the first time she went into the mountains after him, she took a shovel "Then I will bury him".  Recovering in Shiraz, she mentioned it as well, ("I brought a shovel.") making him gag.  He later joked with her about it. ("Maybe you'll finaly get to bury me.")  There's a bit of Shakespeare in it as well:  "I come not to praise Ceasar, but to bury him."

Due back September 05, due to retire then after 20 years Naval Service.  Heading up to Kuwait in a couple of days for 2 weeks, to train reservists in boat operations.  Christmas in a desert tent this year.

I've been approached by the Army about a possible conversion, perhaps a warrent Commission.  Be another 3 years most likely, with a tour in Iraq.  Thinkin' about it. . .
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Civilize them with a Krag . . .
Stoney Pete
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« Reply #31 on: December 13, 2004, 11:03:09 am »

 I understood the significance of the shovel, just did not realize you wasn't bringing us along on her search for him.  I've heard it said, "Leave 'em wanting more."    I want more.  Great ending though.  It's one that allows the reader to use his/her own imagination.

I wish you all the best in your retirement or conversion decisions.  I hope to see more stories from you in the future.
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If it can't be nice, eaten, make money, create comfort or provide real pleasure.........kill it or trade it in on new one!
Brazos Bucky Smith
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« Reply #32 on: December 14, 2004, 02:35:01 pm »

Howdy Drydock,

I'll second that!  Enjoy whatever you decide to do! wether it is three more years of Military life (or more), civilian life in retirement, or writting.  but for us, keep writting, I too, will be looking for your future books.  Merry Christmas  Wink to all of you serving in that theater!  God bless you all.

Brazos
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Brazos Bucky
"A man oughta do what he thinks is right."
BOLD #566, NRA Life (Endowment)
SASS #59058, SBSS #1605, SCORRS
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Cas City Forum Hall & CAS-L  |  GENERAL TOPICS  |  Tall Tales (Moderator: Silver Creek Slim)  |  Topic: "Anachronisem" Feedback - commentary encouraged! « previous next »
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